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You have probably heard that enough times already, but happiness really is a choice. And I'm not talking about waking up every morning and deciding that 'Today is the day I am finally going to be happy!'. I mean it sounds great, but lets be real with each other.
Where is the choice then? If happiness isn't anything that you can do, think, or touch, how do you know when you made the right choice?
Now I can assure you that once you make that choice, you will know; hidden between your thoughts, in the way in which you look at people, in how you think about yourself. That's where starts, and... ends.
There is no secret
Another cheesy, but oh-so-true maxim - there is no secret to happiness. If you catch yourself trying to find that one way of being, of living, that one job, a person, or a thing that will just make all things pink and sparkly, you really are just fooling yourself. I am not trying to be mean, after all we all were conditioned to think that there is gotta be a solution, a way, that something that will just put us on top. We have all been taught to chase in order to achieve, to reject in order to become. When we are young we follow the guidelines set for us by the society, because we are still somewhat allowed to be ourselves, be childish, playful, do things purely for the joy they bring us. We do not need any reason to validate our choices, the only thing that matters is whether we truly want or do not want to do it. As we grow older however, our system of values starts to change. Our first priority isn't joy, or genuineness, but the values we were taught to prioritised; money, status, the amount of owned possessions.
Can you see what has changed here?
Did you suddenly wake up and just decided to not be happy anymore? Or were you just simply fooled into pursuit of the society-defined happiness?
Thinking outside the box
Another widely recognised, yet underestimated maxims. Thinking differently, going against the mainstream isn't only useful in business-talk. It's a mentality that allows to live in a true alliance with oneself. Thinking outside the box means rejection of the already-planned for us life to create the one that truly feels right, and therefore *drum rolls* plays a key role in being happy.
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So where do I start?
The truth is that you never really stopped. It was just such a natural process when you were young that you never really questioned it, until you were taught to do differently. Being pushed around by norms, labels, and expectations might get you off the path, but it never destroys the path itself. We all get lost at some point, but the only way to really 'get back' on track is to look within yourself, not outside. Remember all that you enjoyed as a child, all that you dreamed of.
What did life feel like back then?
Why doesn't it feel that way anymore?
What is stopping you from getting that feeling back?
Everything begins at the first step
Most importantly - do not get overwhelmed. Happiness is not, and should not be something you chase. Remember that we are all divergent individuals. We thrive off the pursuit of our own desires, dreams, passions. Start with looking at yourself - without judgement, with no expectations of what you should or should not be. Allow your intuition to take control over your ego, and notice how you feel at the end of the day. Make choices that feel right with you , be conscious of the actions to take. Don't make happiness a goal to achieve, but rather think of it as a lifestyle, a mentality. You have this life right here, as the person you are with one of a kind dreams, passions, purpose. Don't let it go to waste only because others were afraid to live according to their own uniqueness.
“We must let go of the life we planned so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.” - Joseph Campbell